Jeff's new girlfriend Part II

[jeffreyab]

This is my best match at OKCupid:

http://www.okcupid.com/compare?x=backmasseur&y=Atharaenea

Comments please about the match and OKCupid in general.

Comments

[avt-tor.livejournal.com]

Think of the age difference. I mean, she's into anime.

But seriously, this sounds like a girl who could break your heart without even realizing it. You don't want someone "introverted", you're the introverted one, what you want is someone who will take you for a rollercoaster ride. You are very introspective and you need someone who will not indulge this flaw.

I'm afraid I'll have to be indelicate here. Your little okcupid.com bell curve has you spiking on the "horny" quality. Women's hormones are not really warmed up until they get to their mid-30s. You saw elizilla's dream, and I'm guessing there is an actual pattern there. You don't want a girl who is going to boink a couple times and then dump you because she hasn't figured it out yet, you want one who is (to put it indelicately) easy to please. Remember what Murphy Brown said about (women) turning forty: multiple orgasm, every time.

Because you're a nice guy and my friend I'm going to give you another of my best tips: If you are looking for single women who like sex who share common interests and are in our demographic, if you are looking for women who are huggy, able to share their emotions, and able to talk about sex: look for filkers. Here's the thing: you don't need to be able to sing, you just need to be able to listen.

What you need to think about is not: is this person right for me? The question is: are you right for that person? How can you make yourself right for that person?

I hear you express negative perspectives sometime. We know that life is unfair, but it's how we respond that other people notice. Do we bemoan the injustice? Take humor from the absurdity of it? Become overwhelmed by it? See obstacles as personally challenges on which to measure onself? Remember that we are all looking for happiness, and most people are looking to borrow some from other people, so if you want to have other people around, the thing to do is to generate joy internally and then share it with others.

So the point is not, do you know how to find happiness, but do you know how to give it away?

[jeffreyab.livejournal.com]

I am not sure where the horny level comes from.

I sure don't feel horny. I think I am looking for women who like the physical and emotional interaction but do not expect alot of sex. I have had a difficult time finding someone with whom I have mutual interest.

About filking, the big problem is that I cannot sit in one spot for too long any more. If I do something locks up.

I was also looking for commentary on the site itself.

It does ask alot of questions but more and more it is dominated by the younger set. When I first tried it there were more people in my age range but they have all dropped out.

[misshannah.livejournal.com]

hi-
what is filking?
-clueless in ypsilanti

[jeffreyab.livejournal.com]

Filking is folk music with a science fiction, fantasy or horror theme.

Often a popular tune has new lyrics written for it.

Filkers gather in hotel meetings rooms and sit in chairs for hours singing songs.

[misshannah.livejournal.com]

Thanks! And thanks for letting me know about the "sitting in chairs" otherwise it wouldn't have made sense...

;-)

[jeffreyab.livejournal.com]

So how did you come upon my post anyway?

[misshannah.livejournal.com]

Someone posted a link for a community you belong to in a community I belong to.....(how's that for vague) and I read your user info and I have been to Sarnia and I love libraries so I read a few of your own journal's posts. The end.

p.s. the communities are: ljsingles30 and ljover30

[jeffreyab.livejournal.com]

What brought you to Sarnia?

[misshannah.livejournal.com]

My first time sailing. I had friends who kept their boat there. It was great.

[jeffreyab.livejournal.com]

Yes Sarnia is quite the sailing location.

We have a nice beach too.

[misshannah.livejournal.com]

It's hard to imagine going to the beach with this stupid long cold spring. :)

I'd like to add you to my friends list, if I may...

hannah

[jeffreyab.livejournal.com]

Add away, I'll add you too.

[jeffreyab.livejournal.com]

I have though about it some more I think I could say I have a horny as in curious mind but not a horny body.

Speaking of indelicate...

[marahsk.livejournal.com]

Actually, Murphy Brown said she has one EVERY time, which impressed Corky. It was the female viewers who said "ONE?!?!"

Having said that, I want to also try to offer something more useful. Jeff, you decribed yourself as fat and bald. That may be technically true, but that isn't what comes to my mind when I think about you. If someone asked me for a physical description of you, I would say "tall and good-looking." I know there are many shallow people out there for whom hair and weight are more important than what you think and feel and if you can make them happy. You don't want someone like that anyway.

The age thing depends; it's not the numbers so much as where you are in your life. She's a student, you have an established career. Or, 30 years from now, you'll be old and she won't be.

She says she's bisexual. Would it bother you if she had a relationship with another woman and you weren't part of that?

Re: Speaking of indelicate...

[jeffreyab.livejournal.com]

The post was more of a search for comments on OKCupid and its results. Cutting for age helped some.

I decided to stick to lavalife.